I didn’t have a “father” growing up, but had this instead.
Father’s Day: A Complex Journey of Emotions
Yesterday was Father’s Day, and for many of us, it brings up a mix of emotions. Whether you celebrate, grieve, or reflect, this day holds a unique meaning for everyone.
For me, it’s a day to honor a father I never really knew. My father passed away when I was just three years old. While I have no memories of him, I know I carry so many of his traits:
My loud laugh.
My extroversion and love for adventure.
My entrepreneurial spirit, which blossomed later in life.
More than that, my father changed the trajectory of our family’s story. He lifted my mother’s family out of poverty under communism, sponsoring her siblings to come to the U.S. and build new lives for future generations.
The Beauty and Blessings in an Unconventional Family
Though my family wasn’t traditional and came with its share of brokenness, it also held profound beauty and lessons:
❤️ Resilience and adaptability from moving 13 times as a child, living with aunts, grandparents, and even my best friend’s family during high school.
❤️ The opportunity to heal and rebuild my relationship with my mother, who I once felt distant from.
❤️ Compassion and acceptance, as I’ve unraveled the hardened layers I built to survive but now release to thrive.
❤️ The understanding that grief, while painful, is our ultimate teacher in learning to love more deeply.
The Father Figure Who Showed Me Unconditional Love
On Father’s Day, I called Dan, a family friend who became my father figure after my dad passed. With a heart of gold and a "Buddha-like energy," Dan has been a constant source of support in my life.
At almost 80 years old, he still works full-time and approaches life with childlike curiosity. On my wedding day, I thanked him for being a non-judgmental presence who allowed me to navigate life’s messiness and pursue my dreams.
Dan isn’t a traditional father—he never had kids of his own—but he taught me invaluable lessons about love, acceptance, and creating safe spaces for others.
Finding Lessons and Compassion in Father’s Day
Whether your relationship with your father is traditional, non-traditional, or complicated, there is always space for growth, healing, and lessons. Father’s Day is a reminder that relationships take many forms, and even if they’re not what you imagined, they can hold silver linings and opportunities for compassion.
Remember, you are not alone in this journey. Together, we can continue to heal ourselves and, in doing so, create a ripple effect that heals the world.
Cheering for you always,
Gloria